TV summer preview
By Casey Gillis on Jun. 12, 2008
If you thought “The Surreal Life,” “Breaking Bonaduce” and others like it were digging the bottom of the reality TV barrel, let us introduce you to “Hurl,” which premieres at 9 p.m. July 15 on the G4 network.
This new reality competition series has contestants gorge on heavy meals — like macaroni and cheese or chili dogs — during a short period of time. Whoever eats the most food without, well, hurling, moves on to the next round, where they have to compete in some sort of physical challenge to see who can last the longest while keeping their food down.
Come on now, does anybody really want to watch this?
Then there’s NBC’s “Wipeout” (premieres at 8 p.m. June 24), in which players compete in what the network is touting as “the world’s largest extreme obstacle course, designed to provide the most spills, face plants and wipeouts ever see on television.” The winner is named “Wipeout Champion” and takes home $50,000.
It’s official, folks. Summer — and all the mind-bogglingly stupid and often trashy reality TV series that come with it — is here.
Luckily, “Hurl” and “Wipeout” aren’t our only options. There are plenty of scripted series, both old and new, that will relieve us of the reality rush (though there are a few reality offerings that don’t sound all that bad).
Several summer series have already hit the airwaves, including Fox’s So You Think You Can Dance (8 p.m. Wednesdays and Thursdays), NBC’s Last Comic Standing (8 p.m. Thursdays), The Next Food Network Star (10 p.m., Sundays) and Nashville Star (9 p.m. Mondays on NBC).
ABC’s The Mole (10 p.m. Mondays) began last week, as did TV Land’s She’s Got the Look (10 p.m. Wednesdays), which is basically “America’s Next Top Model” for an older generation: women aged 35 and older compete for a contract with Wilhelmina Modeling Agency and a spread in Self magazine.
On the new drama front, there’s In Plain Sight (10 p.m. Sundays, USA), a quirky dramedy about a U.S. Marshal who works with the Witness Protection Program; the horror anthology series Fear Itself (10 p.m. Thursdays, NBC, and Swingtown (10 p.m. Thursdays, CBS), about a neighborhood of swingers in the 1970s.
Returning dramas include Lifetime’s Army Wives (10 p.m. Sundays) and USA’s Law & Order: Criminal Intent (9 p.m. Sundays), Here’s what else is coming up over the next couple of months (remember, all premiere dates are subject to change):
Tonight
Two TBS comedies are back: The Bill Engvall Show (9 p.m.) and the charming My Boys (9:30 p.m.), in which we’ll find out which love interest sportswriter P.J. took on her Italian getaway.
Monday, June 16
The Middleman (8 p.m., ABC Family)
Based on a series of graphic novels, this comedy is about a covert hero who battles comic book-esque criminals with his new, wide-eyed assistant. Think more along the lines of the quirky fun of “Men In Black” than the darkness of, say, “Batman.”
-- Weeds (10 p.m. on Showtime)
As the fourth season begins, suburban mom and pot dealer Nancy relocates her family to Mexico, where they move in with her late husband’s father (Albert Brooks).
--Secret Diary of a Call Girl (10:30 p.m., Showtime)
“Weeds’” time-slot companion is about a 27-year-old London grad student who works as a high-class escort.
Tuesday, June 17
America’s Got Talent (9 p.m., NBC)
Jerry Springer hosts the third season, which introduces us to a new group of hopeful singers, comedians, contortionists, magicians and impressionists. David Hasselhoff, Piers Morgan and Sharon Osbourne return as judges.
Tuesday, June 24
I Survived a Japanese Game Show (9 p.m., ABC)
Ten Americans are taken to Japan to compete in what ABC is calling “the ultimate Japanese game show.” Challenges include “Chicken Butt Scramble,” in which players don chicken suits and have to smash oversize eggs by sitting on them, and “Why Is This Food So Hard To Eat?,” in which players have to eat food attached to the head of a teammate running in place on a treadmill.
Wednesday, June 25
The Baby Borrowers (8 p.m., NBC)
Originally scheduled for midseason, it puts five teenage couples — ranging in age from 18 to 20 — on the fast track to adulthood. Over a three-week period, they set up a home, get a job and become parents, first to babies, then toddlers, pre-teens, teenagers and senior citizens. To avert any potential disasters, nannies and the babies’ real parents are stationed next door, where they watch via monitors and can step in at any time. Thank goodness for that.
-- Shear Genius (10 p.m., Bravo)
A new crop of high-end hairstylists compete for $100,000 in seed money, an apprenticeship with Nexxus Salon Hair Care and the chance to style hair for an Allure magazine feature. This season, challenges range from cutting hair blindfolded to styling with food products like caramel and mustard.
Friday, June 27
Dance Machine (8 p.m., ABC)
Six everyday folks compete in a series of dance-offs set to popular tunes.
Saturday, June 29
Factory (10 p.m., Spike)
A new comedy series about four small-town guys, who grew up together and now all work in the local factory.
Tuesday, July 1
Celebrity Family Feud (8 p.m., NBC)
Al Roker hosts a celebrity edition of the popular game show. Some episodes will feature a celeb and his or her real-life relatives, while others will feature nostalgic and current TV families.
-- Secret Life of the American Teenager (8 p.m., ABC Family)
In what sounds like “Juno” on the small screen, this one-hour drama is about how a teen girl, her family and friends deal with an unplanned pregnancy. The series stars ’80s teen queen Molly Ringwald as the pregnant girl’s mom.
Thursday, July 10
Greatest American Dog (8 p.m., CBS)
Twelve dogs and their owners compete for the title while living together and taking part in weekly competitions. The winning team walks away with $250,000.
-- Burn Notice (10 p.m., USA)
Scorchingly hot spy Michael Weston (played by Jeffrey Donovan, another of my TV boyfriends) is back for a second season of espionage and intrigue, and I couldn’t be
happier.
Friday, July 11
Flashpoint (10 p.m., CBS)
Enrico Colantoni — last seen playing one of the best dads on TV in “Veronica Mars” — stars as a member of a highly-skilled team of cops who handle everything from hostage situations to attempted suicides to bomb scares.
Sunday, July 13
Big Brother 10 (8 p.m., CBS)
The reality series is back for its 10th installment.
-- I Love Money (9 p.m., VH1)Memorable contestants from VH1 reality series return to compete against each other for a $250,000 grand prize. Among the group are “Rock of Love’s” Heather, “I Love New York’s” Chance, Mr. Boston and Midget Mac and “Flavor of Love” season one winner Hoopz.
Monday, July 14
Two tough-as-nails heroines are back on TNT: Brenda Leigh Johnson on The Closer (9 p.m.) and Grace Hanadarko on Saving Grace (10 p.m.).
Tuesday, July 15
The Cleaner (10 p.m., A&E)
Benjamin Bratt stars as an “extreme interventionist” who helps people in the throes of addiction.
Friday, July 18
Monk (9 p.m., USA)
Hector Elizondo joins the cast as the obsessive-compulsive detective’s new therapist.
-- Psych (10 p.m., USA)
Another popular USA series, another big-name guest star: Cybill Shepherd appears as Shawn’s long-lost mother when the show returns.
Sunday, July 20
High School Musical: Get in the Picture (8 p.m., ABC)
A group of aspiring actors, singers and dancers go through a summer music program to hone their skills. ABC hasn’t revealed what the winner will get, only saying that they’ll be given “the opportunity of a lifetime.” Vague much?
Monday, July 21
Wanna Bet? (9 p.m., ABC)
Celebrities wager on stunt-performing contestants, who attempt everything from skiing over 2,000 fresh eggs without breaking them to solving a Rubik’s Cube while blindfolded and under water.
Sunday, July 27
Jingles (9 p.m., CBS)
After reading the title, I thought this would be a game show that has contestants guessing what product goes with what jingle. But it’s actually a weekly competition in which people write and perform their own jingles. My idea is better.
-- Mad Men (10 p.m., AMC)
Last summer’s breakout hit, which follows the exploits of a group of ad-men in the 1960s, is back for its highly anticipated second
season.
COMMENTS