Ask Emily: Don’t take cat-astrophic step
By Mark Bailey on Dec. 27, 2007
Dear Emily: I have had my cat, “Buster,” for five years and have always loved having him around. But then my boyfriend moved in with me, and Buster has been acting up — not using the litter box, scratching up the carpet and being more aggressive. I can’t think of anything to do, other than get rid of Buster, but I don’t want to have to do that.
Any ideas?
– Bad kitty
Dear Bad kitty: On behalf pet lovers everywhere, let me say that suggesting you “get rid” of your pet because he has become an inconvenience is appalling and irresponsible. There is plenty you can do to help Buster get used to your boyfriend. First, your cat may view your boyfriend as a rival for your affection, so make sure to give him plenty of love. For the litter box problem, you can try confining your cat to his favorite room with his food, water, litter box, and toys just during the transition period. There are also books on training adult cats that can help you, and you can ask your veterinarian for some ideas. Don’t give up either; it can take several weeks for a cat to become adjusted to someone new.
Dear Emily: Every year after the holidays, I get rid of all the junk food in my house and start eating better. This year, however, my boyfriend moved in with me, and he has a sweet tooth. How can I resist the urge to indulge with so many temptations around?
– Soft spot for sweets
Dear Soft spots for sweets: One thing you can do is to allow yourself whatever foods you want one day of the week. Many diets suggest you do this as a way to prevent your body from slowing its metabolism. Plus, when you see a brownie or ice-cream sundae you just have to have, you know you can — eventually. Resisting temptation will be much easier when you know you’ll be rewarded in a few days time. If this idea doesn’t sound comforting, you could always ask your boyfriend to keep the sweets out of your view. Hopefully the “out of sight, out of mind” philosophy will work for you.
Dear Emily: I’m going to a New Year’s Eve party with a friend of mine who loves to drink. The problem is, he is a really mean drunk! How do I get him to stop being such a jerk?
– Bad with booze
Dear Bad with booze: Any way you could get him to be the designated driver this year? If not, you could try being upfront with him and telling him the problem. Maybe if your friend is aware of how he treats people, he will try and be more responsible and considerate. But if you want to avoid that conversation, you could keep suggesting through the night that he paces himself so he will have more fun. And if you just can’t change his behavior and you don’t enjoy hanging out with him when he drinks, the easiest thing to do is stop going to parties with him. He’ll certainly get the message that way.
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